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Archive Issue |
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Tribal Fires Journal |
Waiting for forgiveness Did I choose willingly between your love and his? I remember the last time I was in your heart. The day was a cold wet windy fall day. When you walked away. It's been years and I am waiting for your forgiveness I still love a man I have chosen for life. While you took away a Father's love and keep my spirit trapped in that cold wet windy day. I wait each day for your forgiveness as the sun rises and flows across my days and sets on the tips of the evergreen trees. I rise as the moon chases the sun's warmth and I wait still wait for a Father's forgiveness. This wound I carry, it rips my heart, shredding bit by bit. When the sun rises, I will rise and flow into my days and set into the evergreen again. Longing for his forgiveness. When the moon rises, I will rise again. But, tonight, I will let you go. Forgive me. *** Written by Cherylin Z. Martin-Wade |
The Gift I will always remember the pair of earrings Mike gave to me. They were the crescent moon and star, hung in dancing colors of blue, golden, orange and red. They made my head swim just looking at them attached to my ears. They made me feel like a magic woman scantily dressed in blue silk and lace. After a weekend of letting my silver hair down, I understood that kind of gift needs to be passed on. I didn't really know this until after it happened. I was sitting in my office talking to a woman I had met once as through we had known each other for a lifetime. I met her at Mesaba Coop Park in HIbbing, when I was the manager. Peg came with her guitar to sing for us. I was going through a hard time then. I don't remember the details, only that I was confused over my role as mother and grandmother. My young child had a child. How much do I mother? How much do I let go? Peg gave me a cast statue of a mother turtle carrying a half-grown turtle and a baby turtle upon her back. "I just brought this yesterday." she said. "I didn't know why at the time. Now I do." She gave me a mama turtle with a half-grown and a baby turtle on her back. I liked the way the statue looked and knew it wasn't time for me to let the girls go. That was four maybe five year ago. I worked there two summers. Rande was 19 or 20. Mariah, three or four. "I kept that letter you wrote me thanking me for that gift." she said. "I took it out of the file folder I kept it in a couple of weeks ago. I was losing my confidence. I carried your letter with me and it made me feel strong." I was humbled and honored that my words meant as much to her as the gift she given me, words to touch peoples lives. I kept looking at the earrings in Peg's ears. Tiny-colored dreamcatchers with a small silver feather hanging down. I kept feeling Mike's earrings dancing on my ears. I felt like I was staring because in the meantime Peg started talking about MAAP Assessments and Parent Leadership Training. I couldn't listen. All I could do was watch her earrings change color with the light until I blurted out. "I have this really strong urge to trade earrings." My earrings would look so good with that beautiful blue shirt you're wearing and it would set off that new haircut and color. Or did you always have red highlights in your hair. I wanted the moon magic to go to Peg. I wanted to have little dreamcatchers in my ears to make sure no bad dreams came racing in on a wave of becoming visible. Protection. I need proper protection. I didn't tell Peg all of this, but she knew because she had those two tiny dreamcatchers off faster then I could move one moon. I smiled at the sparkle in her eyes when she put on the dancing earrings. Cherylin walked in, in time for us to show her our trade. Each of us smiling because we got the better deal. "Win-win," Peg said to Cherylin. I tried to tell Michael about the wonderful gift he had givem me and how the moon magic will only be more powerful as it goes out into the world on an adventure of its own. "That's ok," Mike said. "I'm used to being treated that way." *** Written by Judy Merritt.
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Archives Tribal Fires Journal Volume 1 Issue 1 Volume 1 Issue 2 Volume 1 Issue 3 Volume 1 Issue 4
Tribal Fires Journal Tribal Fires Journal Volume 3 Issue 2- Missing Volume 3 Issue 3- Missing Volume 3 Issue 4- Missing Tribal Fires Journal Volume 4 Issue 2 Volume 4 Issue 3 - Missing Volume 4 Issue 4 Tribal Fires Journal Volume 5 Issue 3 Volume 5 Issue 4 Tribal Fires Journal Tribal Fires Journal |
Tribal Fires Journal is currently open for submission of poetry, essay's and short stories for the coming Fall issue.
Please send copies of writings to:
Tribal Fires Journal | 4807 Onigum Marina Drive NW | Walker, MN 56484
Also include your tribal affiliation, and writer's profile.
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Updated: November 22, 2005
